so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
Randomize
