How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
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What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
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So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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