i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
