Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
i will never coherently bang her
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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