Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
