i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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