No, you can still breathe under the balls.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Randomize
