An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
