ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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