If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize