Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
why does every cop we meet know your name?
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
