It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
