i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
I got inside last night via doggy door
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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