Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize
