I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
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No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
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An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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