What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
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