Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Randomize
