the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
Randomize
