This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Randomize
