Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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