Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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