drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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