Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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