Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.