I feel like I've been hit by a train. I woke up this morning covered in wine, free condoms, and a sign language dictionary.
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
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