marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Randomize