I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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