at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Randomize