rhymes with "ouble enetration"
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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