my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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