I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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