Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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