As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
They are going to name an STD after you.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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