I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
The Olympian is in my bed
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
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