I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
