There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
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