nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize