I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
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