I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
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