We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
Randomize
