mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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