Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
