love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
