it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
tequila makes me forget i have legs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
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