My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Randomize
