My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Just woke up wearing a top hat and simpsons boxers. i also found more money in my wallet then what i had before going out, about $1000 more
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
Randomize
