I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Randomize