I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Randomize