I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
whose parrot is this?
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Randomize
