I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Randomize
